Live-Blogging the Apocalypse
Of course, early in the evening, any nervous traveler huddling at Allahpundit’s post would have been reassured. Neither Allahpundit nor the post’s commenters were looking for doomsday. The evening was relaxed, and as far as any of us knew, the world would continue on as the slow-motion train-wreck we’d come to expect.
Not one of us thought to flee.
The banter in the comments was cavalier:
I just wonder if the sun will come out tomorrow? Bet your bottom dollar?
d1carter on September 30, 2013 at 8:18 PM
Hi. So when do the exchanges open because I have a load of extra money laying around and I like to wait 6 months for routine procedures.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 8:42 PM
Do we have white smoke yet?
El_Terrible on September 30, 2013 at 9:09 PM
Do we have white smoke yet?
El_Terrible on September 30, 2013 at 9:09 PM
Soon enough there will all sorts of black smoke. Of course that will be from burning things that shouldn’t be burning.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 9:13 PM
There’s Bishop. This is more difficult to write about than I expected.
Bishop was particularly carefree and in rare form:
Yeah, yeah, I know. Hurl insults and pat yourself on the back. It’s not like you have anything meaningful to contribute.
MJBrutus on September 30, 2013 at 9:15 PM
Now go f–k yourself.
MJBrutus on March 3, 2011 at 9:47
It’s threads like these that I enjoy the most.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 9:43 PM
I’m watching the original Red Dawn right now while wearing a quilted winter vest, and you know who I’m watching it with? Powers Boothe.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 10:36 PM
And why not hang out with Powers Boothe? As repeatedly pointed out for days by Resist We Much, the federal government has shut down more than a dozen times, and the world didn’t end. It didn’t even pause for an intermission.
As the news started coming in — like a whisper one isn’t sure one hears because one is really high, and usually televisions don’t whisper one’s name —
As the news started coming in, we laughed at it. We couldn’t believe it. Even now, it doesn’t seem real:
Any new news?
Abby Adams on September 30, 2013 at 10:54 PM
Any new news?
Abby Adams on September 30, 2013 at 10:54 PM
Yes. People on the east coast have already begun collapsing by their millions, not dead yet but midnight is fast approaching.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 10:57 PM
Yes. People on the east coast have already begun collapsing by their millions, not dead yet but midnight is fast approaching.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 10:57 PM
Come to think of it, I do feel a little dizzy.
katy the mean old lady on September 30, 2013 at 11:08 PM
Come to think of it, I do feel a little dizzy.
katy the mean old lady on September 30, 2013 at 11:08 PM
That’s the Government evaporating from the very air you breathe. If you have a book of USPS stamps around, or maybe a pamphlet of Department of Education guidelines you can burn them in a hibachi and temporarily reenergize the Government back into your air.
When that runs out though . . . only Harry Reid can save you.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:13 PM
It became clear — all too clear — though we still struggled to push reality away.
You can almost hear the uncertainty in Bishop’s voice, if you really, really, really, really, really try:
Yep, you won’t be able to see the Washington Monument tomorrow.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:17 PM
— But we knew.
So four really strange looking dudes on horses just rode past.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:26 PM
Frogs starting to fall from the sky here . . . is uh . . . is that normal?
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:30 PM
Frogs starting to fall from the sky here . . . is uh . . . is that normal?
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:30 PM
And what’s with all the trumpets?
Weird night.
Axe on September 30, 2013 at 11:34 PM
Frogs starting to fall from the sky here . . . is uh . . . is that normal?
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:30 PM
Bishop:
O.M.G, . . . not Falling LizardPeopleVoters!!!!!!
canopfor on September 30, 2013 at 11:31 PM
canopfor on September 30, 2013 at 11:31 PM
False alarm, they’re just French paratroopers.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:44 PM
I went outside and threw a rock straight up, actually saw it carom off with a “thunk” sound . . . dude, it’s happening.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:55 PM
Air raid sirens going off here.
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:57 PM
All sorts of beasts are running through my land, predator and prey running together in peace, running from . . . something. But what . . .
Bishop on September 30, 2013 at 11:59 PM
I never liked any of you people, but good luck anyway. See you on the other side.
Bishop on October 1, 2013 at 12:00 AM
This is Bishop Station, signing off.
Bishop on October 1, 2013 at 12:01 AM
I remember staring in the darkness at the glowing screen, everything silent but the sound of the attack helicopters above my neighborhood firing on the pterodactyls. Time seemed to stop. After maybe an hour, or only five minutes — I couldn't tell — there was this:
I’m still here. I’m still here.
Still, bad idea to take my cult leader’s advice about castrating myself before the comet arrived, I should have ignored that.
Bishop on October 1, 2013 at 12:06 AM
— And then this! Bishop fought on, even to the end!
You know, shouldn’t Bark shut the hell up, he’s been furloughed.
And that shiny jet you love to abuse? Poof. Gone. Those lobsters that Mooch gnaws by the hundreds every week? Bip. Over. Disappeared like a fart in the wind.
Bishop on October 1, 2013 at 12:13 AM
You didn’t pee your initials in the snow yourself, the government made that happen.
Bishop on October 1, 2013 at 12:21 AM
Starbucks will still be open tomorrow, right? Lie to me if you have to, I can’t take much more of this shutdown business.
Bishop on October 1, 2013 at 12:25 AM
This was Bishop’s last message:
I’ll be filling sandbags all night in preparation for the Twin Cities emptying out of desperate government leeches looking for someone to bleed.
You think I’m kidding.
Bishop on October 1, 2013 at 12:28 AM
Harley Winchester Bishop III was never heard from again.
The shutdown will cause . . .
all puppies to die.
faraway on September 30, 2013 at 7:21 PM